Ok, so I think now, six months on, I'm ready to share my Connors birth story.
08/10/2011, 6 AM.
I woke up with the strangest feeling of something going on under the duvet and between my legs, still half asleep it took me a moment to realise that I was soaked. I threw back the covers and waking Dane I told him that I thought my waters had broken, then it became apparent that they hadn't just broken, they'd exploded. He laid towels from the bed to the bathroom, then rang my mum to tell her it was happening. He ran me a bath and as I lay in the water I remember being filled with the same sort of excitement you used to feel at Christmas as a kid, I knew my boy was on his way.
The hospital was called and told me to go in. We covered the car seat with a bin bag and layered towels on top, there really was that much water. And by the time we got to there my pants were stuck to me and my boots were squelching as I walked through the corridors, I looked and felt as though I'd wet myself and because I was so wet and it was October I was so cold, that added with the excitement and nerves meant I was shivering uncontrollably.
Once we got onto the prenatal ward I was attached to a monitor for around an hour, but I was only one centimetre dilated so they sent us home in hope labour would start on its own, I was given an anti biotic tablet to take the next morning as my waters would have been broken for twenty four hours by that point and I was prone to infection, I was also told that if nothing had progressed they would induce me at eight o clock the next morning, this was not going to be necessary.
Back at my mums house, with all the family, I was made a bed up on the couch complete with bags and towels to protect the furniture, by this point though I think most of my water had emptied and I started to look about three months pregnant again. Throughout the day I started to get, what felt like to me, tiny electric shocks through my belly, at first they were bearable, only happening every so often and quite irregularly but progressively getting stronger and more frequent. I was advised to take cocodamol to ease the pain but by the time it got to around seven thirty in the evening I couldn't even feel it.
I didn't think I could take much more by this point so we got in the car and headed back to the hospital. On getting there I was inspected and told I was only just over two cm gone, how could it be going so slow and me be in so much pain?, I was told there were no available Labour rooms and if I wanted to stay I would have to go onto the prenatal ward and no one could stay with me, I didn't want to be on my own so I opted to go back home.
There it only got worse, the pains weren't just in my belly now, they took over my whole body, taking my breath away with every wave, hitting me hard and fast. By early morning they were coming so often that I could hardly take a breath between them, never mind try and sleep, which is what the hospital suggested when my mum called them asking if there was room for me yet, they advised her to put me in the bath. So there we were, two am me in the tub and mum pouring water over me trying to ease the pain, that was a novel idea.
Seven thirty came and we piled in the car, a full twenty one and a half hours later and they took me in to induce my labour. Onto the prenatal ward again were everyone was so calm, and me unable to suppress my pain. Only Dane could come onto the ward with me, mum had to wait outside. I was put onto a monitor for an hour and I remember saying to Dane that if it got any worse and I couldn't get any other pain relief soon I was going to have to do what I least wanted to and have an epidural. At last I was examined and one midwife said to another, "she's a good four, lets take her down", I've never got into my nightie so quick, and off we went, collected mum and moved onto the labour ward at last.
It was ten thirty when I got into the labour room and onto the gas and air, I remember feeling my face tingling and slowly going numb, it was amazing, this was going to get me through. They wanted to put me onto a drip as I was dehydrated, but as I was progressing so fast now they let me just down a glass of cold milk, the most refreshing drink I've ever had. I'd been in the labour room what seemed like five minutes when I felt this incredible urge to start pushing, I told this to the mid wife and she shouted "no, not yet", but I couldn't control, I fought against my body, a losing battle it was doing it on its own, they inspected me and I was now fully dilated so she let me push, but he was still very high up and she was worried I was going to exhaust myself but I couldn't stop I needed to do it, for it to be over. On all fours I pushed and pushed and moved him quite a way but still not far enough. I was then advised to go to the toilet as apparently you can push easier on an empty bladder, sat on the toilet I couldn't make myself go, however I think the walk to the bathroom did me a favor and as I got back onto the bed he was so close to being here. I remember the feeling and shouting that I was pooing, which I wasn't that was just the sensation I got.
I pushed long and hard and then came the stinging, burning feeling and his head was on its way out. The mid wife was sponging water over me and that helped a lot. Then out of nowhere there he was lying on my chest, I had informed the mid wife before hand that I wanted to make sure I was watching when Dane cut his cord, which she did, not that I remember it now, I'd had so much gas. I'd opted to have the injection to bring the afterbirth quickly. Then came the stitching.
They let me stay on the gas and my mum held my hand throughout, whilst Dane became accustomed to his son. It took them forty five mins to find where I was bleeding from as it was not a normal tear, as Connor was being delivered he turned inside me and tore my muscle with his elbow. They used anaesthetic but I still felt every stitch, again the gas got me through it.
Afterwards I was able to shower, I was so shaky and frightened of slipping and splitting my stitches. I was so tired, it had been thirty and a half hours of hard work, but now, seeing my son and loving him already I knew he was worth every second.
Connor Joseph Roberts was born at 12:28 pm on Sunday 09/10/2011, at 40 weeks gestation weighing 7lbs and 8oz.